The secret to Happiness: To be loved

 We go through life subjected to a desperate need to find happiness. Yet, as hard as we try, regardless of what we do, nothing seems will ever get us to that state of nirvana. Yes!, would life not be much easier, if we would just know what is exactly that fills our souls with happiness? 

Oh well... it feels like pleasure is the only insight we have available to help us guiding our pursuit of happiness. As a matter of fact, Neuroscience shows that our brain determines our actions and behaviors based on what it reckons will yield most joy.  

When we were free in Nature we used to find pleasure mainly in food and sex. If we consider life in indigenous communities, it seems like that basically did it. Indeed, apart from the sufferings that will certainly arise during the occasional periods of scarcity, illness or various other hardships alike, one would say that indigenous people generally enjoy a happy life. It therefore stands to reason to hypothesized, that back in the freedom of Nature the pursuit of happiness in general terms consisted in the competition against our tribemates, whereby we strived to achieve the kind of dominance, that would place ourselves first in line for these sources of pleasure. 

Civilization, however, then started slowly but surely creeping up into our lives and along came money. Under civilization, those with enough money would now become empowered to dominate everyone else and buy themselves immediate and ready access to all the intake of pleasure to their hearts content. However, it turns out this actually does not quite do it. Definitely, we see time and time again how rich people, man and women, as much as they enjoy all the power to always have their way and get anything they want from anybody else, they will not necessarily be any happier than the average of other folks, who have their basic needs covered. Clearly, there is something more to happiness than wealth, domination and pleasure. Indeed, there is one thing neither power nor money can procure: love; that is, true love. Yes, there is a really good case to be made, that the key to happiness is to be loved. While there may be other components, there can be little doubt that love is paramount to happiness, and it would really help us to comprehend, that nobody will ever be able to be happy, if he or she does not feel loved.

Most definitely, if nobody loves us, clearly we do not mean a contribution to anybody. Consequently, if we do not contribute to anybody's life, we are effectively a burden to the community, because we otherwise most certainly consume resources. Finally, if we are a burden, then we can only surmise, that it is best for the whole, if we just go. 

It may sound cruel, but what would we think if we found out about a number of cells in our organism, which, much like a parasite, are only leeching off the rest of the cells in our body? It certainly makes sense to conceive our love dependency as the self-enforced mechanism devised by Evolution to dissuade us from becoming a parasite to the whole. If it were not because of our heavy dependency of affection, nothing would stop us from just ruthlessly going about our relentless pursuit of wealth and pleasure, without the slightest regard for anybody else's feelings or wellbeing, dominating and abusing anyone as needed or desired, and doing whatever we would reckon could advance our position and interests. Definitely, we would all be some veritable, sheer assholes, if it were not because our need of love and affection has us all by the balls.

Moreover, it is definitely our need of love and affection, what makes us stronger; since it is what coerce us into working together. More than just dissuading us from leeching off, it is likewise Evolution's mechanism to have social animals come together and cooperate with each other: In our relentless pursuit of love, our natural instinct will drive us into helping the people around us, as the appreciation we will get from it will make us feel happy. 

  

Tragically, as much as the System's ideology is supposed to help us find our way through a happy life, all system ideologies, past and present, will faill to provide the flimsiest hint that, if what we want is to be happy, the best advice is to win the love of the people around us. Horror of horrors, whereas religions at least promoted brotherly love, as the most certain passage to Heaven, our modern fake-democratic system ideology exclusively emphasizes the supreme value of money. There is, however, no strong reason to see any conspiracy or deliberate perverse motive whatsoever behind system ideologies' omission of the paramount role of love in our quest for happiness. After all, civilization only breaks out once an elite of a few families, in totally disregarding of everybody else's feelings and wellbeing, rises above all others and succeeds at subjugating the entire body of citizens. In fact, those born to an elite family find themselves from the very first day in their lives, in the sheer diabolical conjuncture, where they will only be able to survive if they manage to come out on top from the most ruthless and merciless fight for power. Clearly, in such a competitive and hostile environment those at the top of the society will never get a taste of the devine flavor of being loved. Yet, if they never had a chance to know what it means to be love - but always had to fight to the death against anybody around them -; no one can expect them to ever seek any love, but they will always only know how to subjugate and abuse everybody around them. It turns out, it is not enough that their nature has them by the balls, to keep them from being some veritable, sheer assholes. If they completely ignore the existence of love and therefore remain totally unaware that their dependency of love has them by the balls, they will obviously still ruthlessly go about their relentless pursuit of wealth and pleasure, without the slightest regard for anybody else's feelings or wellbeing, dominating and abusing anyone as needed or desired, and doing whatever they will reckon could advance their position and interests. Regrettably, their nature's consequent excruciating reprisal for their defiance, will be of no consolement to anyone. 

    Now, if the system ideology is always shaped by those at the top of the society, and they are most absolutely oblivious to the existence of love, no wonder - what kind of fool would expect - the system ideology to ever provide any hint on the supreme importance of fulfilling our need of love and affection, in order to be ever able to get anywhere close to happiness. Horror of horrors, if at least the populace had come to this world in good contact with our loving nature and always unquenchably thirsty for love; now, with the flare up of civilization, the system ideology is going to corrupt and rot us all. As we are increasingly indoctrinated in the monotheistic worship of money and, little by little get detached of our natural need of love and affection, we slowly become the same kind of veritable sheer assholes as our masters. As a matter of fact, does it not sound familiar?

Now, just when we thought it could not get any hotter than the frying pan, we fell right into the fire. The final nail in the coffin of our hopes to be ever able to find the secret path to happiness: if by any chance any enlighted sage had ever receive the revelation of the true power of love and had attempted to spread the gospel as the heart of a new system ideology; it turns out the forces of natural selection are also against us, since system ideologies bear a natural inclination to evolve away from the recognition of love as the true God, and towards the ardent, exuberant and zealous exaltation and worshipping of money. After all, the raison d'etre and whole point of the system ideology is to bind the populace under the head-of-the-society's leadership and command. Clearly, the ideology will be fitter the more control it affords the head of the society over the populace. Undoubtedly, money works like magic to bait and herd folks into anything. Yeah, we all love the Pharaoh and Jupiter, but, hey!, if Emperor Constantine converted to Christianity and all what it takes to get a promotion is to follow suit, it will not be long before we chop the Pharaoh's head off and kiss Jupiter goodbye. Now, try to accomplish that with love. Let us see how are you going to pile a mount of love in some place, in order to have everybody run towards it.

Yet, loyalties grown out of money are rather volatile: we will unhesitatly obey the master who feeds us, but that will only last while our belly remains full. On the other hand, love forges incredibly strong and stable bonds. For instance, Rome loved Julius Caesar to bits, and his men were ready to follow him anywhere and do anything for him. Indeed, there is a good case to be made that there is a significant dominance component in love. Would we not be ready to do anything for the person we love? It then stands to reason to infer that behind our need of love and desire to be loved, there is a wish to have our lover do anything for us. However, love is clearly another whole can of worms. Definitely, you cannot just bark your orders around and expect to be loved. You need to be mindful of the other person's feelings, wishes and wellbeing. Indeed, any man could tell you how much work it takes to just maintain his sweetheart's love. You will just have to ask yourself what is that you can do for your lover, if you ever want that person to start asking herself or himself, what is that she or he can do for you.

Now, be mindful, we had already agreed that civilization was about the populace working for the head of the society, not the other way around. Indeed, Civilization is slowly, softly killing us with its song.